Fear and love

Walk towards me knowing I have a twitch in my muscles. Come closer knowing my tendons are strained. My teeth grind. My jaw locks. When I swallow my boiling spit sears the lining of my throat. Don’t speak. I wouldn’t hear you above the throbbing inside my head. Move slowly through the imagined landmines I’ve placed at your feet. Fear me and be drawn to that fear. Need it like you need your head pet. Need it like you need your body kissed. Welcome home.

Grabbing your throat feels like loving words whispered in your ear because long ago your mind decided violence is love. Throwing you into a wall is foreplay because long ago your pussy decided rage is intimacy. My sonnets are the bruises I leave on your body. My songs are the cries I rip from your mouth. Every time my hand strikes your face your gaze will rise to meet mine. Your suffering eyes will beg for more. Your quivering lip will grow steady because the hurt I inflict is no worse than all the hurt you’ve endured. Welcome home.

Believe that your submission soothes me. When you’re tied up and I’ve stuffed your panties in your mouth, convince yourself that consenting to my darkest desires will give me peace. It won’t. There’s no peace within me. There’s only turmoil. Look closely and you’ll see it beneath the surface when I’m laughing. You’ll hear it in the way I say your name. It will send chills through your subconscious like a voice from your past that you can’t remember but will never forget. Welcome home.

If you are drawn to this I pity you because soon you’ll be too close. My gravity reels you in until you’re skipping across the event horizon of my dominance. Fall into me and lose yourself as if you aren’t already lost. Let’s pretend you haven’t been wandering in the dark your entire life with your arms stretched out in front of you feeling and grabbing at anything. Latch on to me like a parasite who found its final host. Gain strength from the pain I inflict. Grow strong from the fear that I foster. I am your new home. This is where you belong and your soul knows it. It new it the moment it became intertwined with mine.